Unfortunately I have actually found myself thinking about this subject more than I perhaps would wish!!!!
I do agree with your points but I think the difficulty of thinking through these theories is that our actual language, ie the actual words we use, are gender neutral in spite of the fudging of things like history/ herstory (which often show ignorance of the origins of words themselves). It is entirely possible to write English in a way that does not indicate the gender of the writer. This can be useful and does not need defence like wanting to change Manchester to Womanchester.
My definition of feminism has always included the abolition of these and other "artificial constructs" to enable the achieving of the aim that I see as most important. That is equality for all regardless of their gender, race or religion- and I think the means for doing that are already present in our western societies. Barriers need to come down, not go up.
That sounds really prissy, but it is still almost as far away as when it seemed to make so much sense forty years ago!!
