Perhaps the crucifixion of Jesus was an analogy of self transmutation.
The crucifixion was a reflection of many things.
"Suffering" in the belief of such difficulty as "rising above helplessness" in Self mastery. Ignorance of ego. Love of God. Unity of the un-manifest and the manifest. Reincarnation.
Circumvention of Karma through self discovery.
Illusion of the physical body.
The battle between good and evil also known as intuitive knowledge of Self and the destructive habit of clinging to physical identity.
Surrender and Service.
God in multidimensional activity...to name a few.
When one experiences God, then one realizes that there is only God in the reflection of potential. Life gets interesting when one realizes that all experiences are a reflection of ones inner being, henceforth there is no believing in others, only self growth through reflection, realizing that others are just a mirror of our inner projections.
Life does get interesting when one experiences the reflections as ones inner being. Until God is perceived as the underlying Truth of all reflections the illusion of growth, or "Second Birth" is a choice to discern between the underlying Truth and the surface reflections.
Once that choice has become permanent there is only God. All desires, experiences, thoughts, and actions everywhere and always are no longer owned in the thought of individuality. There is only One Mind manifest from the unmanifest.
I want my ego to be a friendly servant.
It's nice to want.
But you still can't solve a problem from the level in which it was created.
Or said another way. Wanting doesn't give you results. It may draw forth the necessary reflections of truth and illusion but how will you discern between the two without the experience of truth? The reality is, that the truth has always been present within illusions of belief, why would saying you want something different actually change anything, even if you say it a thousand times?
Relative truths are the illusions of belief and opinion. Wanting from illusion and projecting an ideal from illusion doesn't create change, it just cycles old ideas into a temporary thought of something new.
"The spiritual man is trying to free himself from the materiality that is the cause of his prodigal wandering in the maze of incarnations, but the ordinary man does not want more than a betterment of his earthly existence."
