Originally posted by Mung:
Amaranth,
RE: CFIDS
"Despite years of study, there is still no laboratory marker or universal treatment for CFS" - cfid.org
In what ways do you soothe yourself and allay your bereavement? I can not imagine what this condition is like for you. What has it taught you about life, I mean how has it affected your perceptions? Do you have difficulty editing because of potential concentration problems? Will science, hopefully in the near future, be more adroit at eradicating this scourge?
Sincerely,
:rolleyes:
I hope you cannot imagine what it is like to be too physically weak to hold your own child in your arms and to have your mind and everything in it taken away by a capricious virus. At one point for about a year and a half I could not read or write any of the three languages I knew before I fell ill. I could barely speak for stuttering and stammering; I had a message machine answer the phone and got my mother to field calls for me when necessary. An entire very good college education disappeared seemingly into a black hole. I have gotten some parts of it back in bits and pieces, but I am not whole yet.
What has it taught me about life? Every day is a precious gift to be used to its absolute fullest. I do not wait to do any small kindness I can think of for tomorrow I may not be able to think at all. Perhaps most of all I have had to learn that every human being, myself included, has value simply because they exist. I am no longer defined in terms of my vocation, the second question everyone asks when they meet someone, as I have none. I have taken to telling people I'm a cat herder (I have five cats who love me to death) and most people don't get the joke. I had to learn that life comes one day at a time and I live my life as though each one were my last. It gives me incentive to be myself first and foremost and let the chips fall where they may.
Yes, I have difficulty concentrating. I scroll back and forth repeatedly to answer your several questions. I have learned to cope with the challenges CFIDS throws in my path; I have created many work-arounds to obstacles others would not think of as obstacles. Too weak to use the can opener today? Get something out of the freezer to eat. Falling asleep at the computer in the middle of the day? Go to bed for a couple of hours. Road trip? Take lots of caffeine and crisps along. Can't reach the top shelf in the cupboard? Get a pair of tongs or do without it. Live as though you know how and don't worry overmuch about tomorrow; sufficent to each day are the troubles thereof.
Will Science overcome this scourge? Heavens, I hope so. Only if enough research goes into finding the causes. In my case I firmly believe it is due to a viral infection of the brain; as long as I take my antiviral drug the symptoms stay suppressed; when I go off of it they return in force. I have a very good relationship with my doctor and pharmacist. They keep me sane. If research found a cure for this malady I'd be first in line for the cure, even if it were dangerous. I've been through the crucible and I've paid my dues; I'll take what I can get. I may bend, but I will never break; even when the storm is at the worst I never give up hope for the calm afterwards. As bad as things get, and I hope you cannot imagine the depths I have seen, it will pass eventually. As the Bible says, "It came, to pass" and it does pass. I live for the good days and endure the bad ones. Once in a while I get a chance to climb up on a soapbox and educate others. Thanks for the opportunity. I will now return you to your regularly scheduled Forum.
"Amaranth"
